I had planned to blog again and yet I haven't....

Here we are, almost a year since I last posted. I had planned to start blogging again, but that just didn't happen. 

What a year we've had! Starting from where I left off I guess back in January.

Derek had just gotten his first covid vaccine, then got his second covid vaccine just days after he got a pneumonia vaccine, and so he was really sick. I have to admit, after seeing his reaction to his second shot, I felt hesitant to get my covid shots! However, when they opened it up to all the public, I did it, and I had no reaction other than a sore shoulder. Jadon got his a little less than a month later, and he ended up tired, with a headache and a little nauseated (which may or may not have been anxiety related!)  Avery got hers right after her birthday and had no reaction but a headache. Carter had his first one a couple weeks ago, and next week on  the 9th he gets his second one. Derek also got his booster, and I suppose its time for me to get my booster now as well since its been over 6 months. So, soon our whole house will be vaccinated!

So lets see, what else has happened since then that's significant. Well, I tweaked my back somehow in January. I could barely walk for a week, and then for another week or so after that I could only stand for short periods before it would hurt again. I have no idea what I did. I had not done any heavy lifting or weird bending. Anyways, I started doing yoga everyday to see if that helped. Between the stretching and strengthening that yoga offers, plus a lot of the stuff yoga  does is the same exercises they had me do at physical therapy many years ago. While yoga didn't help my back, it has done many other great things for me. My balance has drastically improved!! I did not expect that! I always just thought i was a clumsy oaf, but now I can actually put my pants on standing up without losing my balance! Yoga is slowly strengthening me. Its completely vanished what I can only describe as nerve twangs in my elbow and in my foot. I am certain that all the stretching helped my plantar fasciitis in my heal as that also. And just all the stretching feels great! I've been doing it now for around 10 months, which is the longest I've ever stuck with an at-home program! And I have no plans of stopping anytime soon, i really enjoy it!

At the end of March, and the first day of April, Carter and Avery got to go back to in-person school for half days, then at the end of April they went back full time! I was so worried about Carter since we struggled so hard doing school online! But he was thriving from in-person school! And he's made a lot of friends really fast and he's loving the social aspect, and its been great for him all around! He's smart as a whip, and reads crazy good! He started swimming lessons in September and just passed level 1 this week, and he's come a long ways. He will start level 2 in January as well as soccer.

Avery was so happy to be back for her last month of elementary school. We had planned to send her to East Linn, but in the end of July we decided she would be happier at NAMS. It was the right call, she is so extremely happy there. She's made new friends. She loves middle school. She got straight A's for her first quarter, and is on the same path for the second quarter. She's on her 4th year of viola. Her swim team was nixed in like May, and she doesn't want to join a new team, so she's not doing any sports or anything. 

Jadon started high school!! HOLY COW!! Its so weird to think that we have a high schooler! High school seemed so far away when he was in elementary school, and yet, here we are now, just a blink of an eye later! I think school is getting harder, and sports are definitely different! They practice every day for up to 2 hours sometimes, and its taken more seriously. He did cross country and he ended up really liking it. Even though he was the only boy on the team. Right now he just started basketball. There's a ton of JV kids though so they split the team and he's on the JV2 team. He is now taller than me and hairier than his father. 😄 

I don't think much has changed for Derek. He's now working from home full time and no plans to be back in the office ever again. It is really nice having him home. Many days during the week we get to have lunch together. And it helps with transportation for school and after school activities. He likes it.

I decided its time to quit my job, so December 31 is my last day. I decided to quit for a few reasons. Having a break last year gave me time to reflect on how crabby and exhausted I was from being so busy, especially between april-june. And like i mentioned in the last post, i felt like I was missing out on the kids. Since we opened children's ministry at church back up in April, my heart hasn't been in it. My heart is with my family, and so I have trouble working. Perhaps if the job was a normal 9-5 job or something, where I could leave my work at the door at the end of the day, then I would feel a little differently, but I cant just leave the work out of my head. Except now, i am having a hard time actually thinking about work, which isn't fair to our children's dept. I'm afraid once all our programs are back up and running I'll be back in the same boat I was in of not being able to think about anything else, and laying awake at night thinking about all the things I'm needing to do at church, or how to run programs, etc. 
Another reason, I've just become very disgusted with so many people there. Some people refuse to come to church because they refuse to wear masks. However, 95% of the people there aren't wearing masks at all anyways. I'm just sick of peoples stupid comments and selfishness. As Christians, we should be so much better than this. This is setting a terrible example, and will 100% not get non-Christians through the doors. 
Another reason, we are burned out. Since we opened back up, we've struggled to get enough volunteers, so Derek and i are working in a classroom almost every single week. Over the summer, we had several volunteers decide to take the whole summer off (mind you, we opened back up in April, which means that they all had a year off already!) We had to limit the number of VBS attenders because of inadequate volunteers. 
Another reason, I'm finding it hard to keep up with life. With kids back in school, all at different schools and different release times, and we opted to not do the bus this year to minimize more covid contact. Plus, they are so short on buses, almost every week there's a route cancelled because no drivers for that route, so it was just not worth it. Also, the kids are all doing things after school, and Derek and I already have to tag team each other to make things work. Adding Wednesday night church to the mix just doesn't work. 
Also, since I started working, I quit volunteering at the schools. I was exhausted and had no desire to add something else to my plate. Since I am only halfheartedly working right now, I have been volunteering at carters school twice a week. I love being there, and he enjoys it when I'm there. 💗
We've been eating so much better now too because I'm cooking all our meals instead of just throwing a box of chicken nuggets or corn dogs on a tray all the time. I have spices in my cupboards that I've finally been using from half a decade or more ago! (Side note, last year we had thanksgiving with just us and no other family, and I cooked my first thanksgiving smorgasbord, and it turned out great! We had mashed potatoes, stuffing, sweet potatoes, green bean casserole, ham, rolls, bradley salad, and a couple pies! And it all turned out delicious so now I feel more confident making those dishes.)

Unfortunately I'll have to find another job eventually, as life is just too expensive. We could make it work but then we'd never be able to save anything for vacations and home improvements, or at least it would be very slow going. Hopefully I can find something that works with our life, and that I can put away at the end of the day.

So there you have it, that has been our life since my last post. I wish I could say I'll blog more but i doubt that would be true. 

New year, new goals

 Its been awhile since I've blogged again. There are 2 major reasons for that. 

1. Jadon got Minecraft on my computer that he likes to play with his friends. He also got a flight simulator game that he plays on my computer. 

2. The Chromebook that the school supplied us with, is not the greatest, so for Carters class meetings, he has to use my computer otherwise his teacher lags so badly that he is 10 seconds behind on everything. So, to conclude, Jadon has my computer in the evening's and on weekends. And Carter has it during the day. 

So 2020 really stunk. As we all know.

For me, it wasn't because of the virus. Yes, Covid really threw a wrench in all our plans, but the virus was actually a blessing. I didn't realize how tired and stressed I was with life until the world shut down and suddenly I had so much time to be in my house, with my kids and husband. Before that, I was crabby and stressed because we were always busy. Between kids events, school, and church taking up all my mental energy.
Covid gave me a chance to get to know my kids again, and I'm so grateful in that aspect because Jadon is nearly 14 now, he won't be home for too many more years. And once he starts driving, I'm sure we will see him less and less. :( So I'm not in any big hurry to get back to normal. 

The problem is people's responses to Covid. I heard some of the most idiotic and heartless comments about the virus. How can people think its all political??? How can people not think of protecting others even if they don't care about it effecting them?? Some comments I heard:  "Why don't they just wait until the hospitals are overrun before they shut things down?"  "Its just a cold, they are overreacting."  "The only people that die from it are elderly people, and they don't care anyways, they've lived their lives." 
On top of all the stupid comments like that, people griping about wearing masks, or social distancing, or having to cancel activities.  People refusing to cooperate with contact tracing in order to warn others. This is just some of the stupidity I heard/saw. 

Then of course there's politics which I'm not getting into. But everyone fighting about politics. Losing friends because they can't agree to disagree. 

And the racism and BLM stuff. Which I refuse to discuss. 

And the rioting. 

But because of all this, and because people refuse to put themselves in someone else shoes to see the world the way they do, they have to fight about it. All I saw every day when I got on Facebook was people arguing about something. People posting garbage news they heard and fighting over it. People complaining about everything. People whining about having to do online school and complaining that the school did a terrible job of preparing.

What happened to kindness? Grace?? Treating others as better than yourself???

What I'm getting at here is that 2020 left me feeling very angry and bitter. I can hardly stand people other than my own family. Even people in our church I'm disgusted with because of their dumb comments and lack of grace and kindness. I've been snippy with people. I've been avoiding people. Because I just can't take it anymore. 

I understand that we all have our own differences and opinions. That is totally ok! But when people lose friendships or family relationships over things, or don't think about how their words or actions affect others, it really has gotten to me. 

My goal for 2021 is to somehow not let anger and bitterness take hold of me. I never engage in arguments with people over things, and I will continue with that. But somehow I have to figure out how to not let all these comments harden my heart for people. I think the only way to accomplish that is to get on a regular prayer and quiet time schedule. God needs to be front and center in my thoughts.

My next goal is get get myself healthy. Last year, I think we all let ourselves go a little. But, I'm 40 now, its time to start taking better care of myself. So my goal is to lose 20 lbs., but more importantly to get into a regular exercise routine. 

In other news, the kids are doing great! Jadon's school has been in person since fall and its going surprisingly well. So far. He's doing good as usual with his grades. He's obsessed with planes and flying still, which is not a bad thing. He's a good kid. He's responsible and he does what he's asked without a fight, sometimes before we even have to ask him. Never in a million years thought that we'd be talking about what a good kid he is since he was a handful when he was younger, but I'm quite proud of him now. He is about an inch shorter than me, and that gap is closing FAST! I'm so thankful for that. As you may remember, he had premature adrenarche, and his bone age was was several years ahead of his age, so the endocrinologist expected his full grown height to be, if I remember correctly, around 5'8", potentially shorter. I was sad for this because he comes from a family of tall people. I didn't want him to be shorter than his own mom. I was praying he would be at least as tall as me. 5'9" (although I now regularly measure 5'8.5") The last 2 years, his bone age scan has shown no change, and so its now closer to where it is supposed to be for his age, which increases his potential adult height. 

Avery is good, she is happy to be in school , even though she has been completely online since fall. She just loves school. She's in her 3rd year doing viola and she likes that too. Swim team has been put on hold now as the pool is shut down, so unfortunately she isn't getting any swimming in. She's 11, but she informs us nearly daily that she's "practically 13" now. ;) Slow down girl, enjoy being a kid. Someday you'll wish you were 11 again! Adulting isn't all its cracked up to be! Next weekend she starts doing a couple extracurricular classes for a couple months. She is a TAG student (Talented And Gifted) which basically means she's super smart and so the college offers classes to give these TAG students some extra things to help keep them learning at their level and give them something to do. She's taking a drawing class and a travel type class. Now that I think of it, that might start today......

Carter is... well... Carter. Active, loud, talks or makes noise completely. School for him has also been online since the fall, and he does not like it. In fact, he tells us daily that he hates school. It has been a big struggle for us all. He is a very SMART kid, I never realized he was smart, but I think in the spring/summer when I was trying to home school him a little, I think he was acting like he didn't know anything just to get out of doing it. He has 4 class meetings online a day, each a half hour long. He gets bored during these. Two of the meetings are broken down into small groups, and his group is him and about 5 other kids who are at the same level of learning as him, so his group moves faster than other groups, but he just doesn't like it. He has behavioral issues because of this and we have been working with the teacher to help him with these issues. But man, its exhausting on so many levels. 

There is the potential for Carter and Avery's school to open up in February. I am PRAYING they can go back. Carter needs to be in person for school, he'll do much better. And this is Avery's last year of elementary and she really wants to be at the school. Please pray too!!!!

Derek is great. He got his 1st covid shot last week since he is high risk with his asthma. He's been working from home since march, and at this point it looks like he will be working from home forever. 

Well that's it for now.